“What do I have to offer?”
“You have much to offer.”
“Much? Me? I don’t know what it is, what You think I have to give.”
A quick flash of my work life went through my mind. I heard the praise of many people on how I just stepped in and did so much in such a short period of time.
“True enough, I feel like I’ve stepped into my element at work but what does that have to do with this?”
“They need the same things you’re giving at work. Creativity. Insight. Administration. A willingness to take a project and run with it and see it succeed. They need the same go-getter attitude you are getting praised for at work.”
“How can I give that much? I’m giving all I have every day at work and now I’m supposed to somehow find the strength to do it at church too? How? I’m exhausted now.”
“Why do you find it so much easier to give your all at work than you find giving your all to Me?”
“I don’t know.” I say but thoughts of praise and tangibility come to mind pretty quickly on the heels of my words.
“I have a purpose for you and it encompasses all that you have to give. Yes, I am using you at work and I am pleased with your efforts there but there is more. You have a work to do in My Kingdom as well. Your success at work is just a way to show you what is possible in other areas of your life where you are not so daring, not so bold, not so confident. You could be as confident working in My kingdom as you are working in a job if you would just trust me and step out of your comfort zone.”
The pastors message from Sunday – authority equals responsibility – comes back suddenly with great clarity and I know why I work so hard at work. There is praise. Immediate gratification in a lot of ways – a paycheck, things that I can see and touch and feel and benefit from. That wouldn’t be the case just giving to a church so freely. The benefits would be there but many of them would be eternal.
Where your heart is….
What do I treasure? Hard question. To look at my life it would appear I treasure work and the opinion of man but my lips say I treasure God and His eternal purpose. So, now that I’m faced with Him asking me directly if I will give Him as much of myself and my talent and gifts as I am giving at work I have to decide if I am really who and what I claim to be. Am I someone so sold out to God that I will willingly give Him my all, be broken and poured out for Him? Or am I someone who seeks to praise Him with my lips but has my heart far from Him, resting in the things of the world that will surely pass away and offer no reward in the end?
This is not my favorite kind of conversation. I much prefer to hear God say, “Keep up the good work” or some other comforting thing to show me I’m going the right way. Course corrections are vital but still not my favorite. Even as I write that I know that course corrections are really the only way to become like Christ and the only way to fulfill all that God created me to be. I am His workmanship, His handiwork, born anew in Christ to do HIS work…and today I am reminded again of Whose I am.
